Archives for category: thoughts

Why do people lie?

Why do people feel it necessary to do hurtful things?

Why can the world be so cold at times?

Why is true love so hard to get in return?

Why can’t money buy happiness?

Why are people so heartless?

Why do people settle?

Why have I gone unnoticed?

Why must all good things come to an end in some type of way?

Why am I even asking these questions?

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I think a feel major depressed mode coming upon me. I’m trying hard to fight it but I can’t. I’m not really really sure what is causing it. I am trying not to stress over things that are beyond my control. I don’t really want to interact with most people that I am normally around. Normally I start to over eat when I feel this way but this time I don’t really want food at times. I rather lay in bed and stare around or drive with no set destination most times. I tried music but most times it makes my thoughts more sad than before. I find myself crying for no reason. I know what some of the things that are making my heart heavy but I am still scratching my head about the rest. It’s becoming harder at times to smile. My emotions are so mixed up that I confuse myself. I have prayed about it for a while. I just don’t feel strong anymore I’m tired. I don’t even really care to here it will be ok because if so then when? My kids and a few others always seem to bring me joy but deep down I wonder what they really think of me is it really all positive?? I really don’t have too many to turn to truth is sometimes I wish I did.

I love the excitement I get inside when my phone goes off and its a text, pic or call from you.

I love the thoughts that run thru my mind endlessly all day every day.

I love the way your body feels up against mine.

I love the soothing sound of your voice in my ear.

I love your smile

I love way it feels to be held close by you.

I love kissing you.

I love that you aren’t judgmental.

I love sitting on the phone talking to you for hours at a time.

I love how the small things mean a lot to you.

I love that family means so much to you.

I love that you are humble.

I love how your always on my mind.

I love your honesty.

I love that my children love you.

I love your affection.

I love that you are a beautiful person inside and out.

I love that you are so spoiled.

I love that you are supportive

I love your cookies… Lol

I love everything about you……

Why do the good ones always have to finish last?

When is last?

If you know how bad it feels to be hurt why would you hurt someone?

If you into a person why try to turn them away?

If you tired of being hurt why is it so hard to accept someone that can bring happiness?

When is enough really enough?

I know you been hurt in the past but guess what I didnt do it. I know you have had bad days at work because you argued all night. And I know sometimes just the thought of all the hurt and pain has made you cry and become so angry. But guess what I didnt do it. But I am willing to be your friend to listen and maybe even cry with you. I know how it feels to be hurt and to have to go on with your day like nothings wrong. I know how it is to try to hold back tears or emotions because you not in the right place to break down. But sometimes you just have to wear your emotions on your sleeve because its not healthy to hold all that inside. But just remember dont punish the ones who now have your best intrest at heart and want to see you smile. You are a beautiful person inside and out and I think it sucks what you went thru but what you going thru right now dont have to be bad. Stop turning around to see her behind you. Look forward and see me in front of you……A friend who truly care about you and hopes that you are completely happy one day real soon…..

Not everyone you love is going to love you back. That’s why it’s more important to love yourself more than anything.

Oh what I would give to see your face again and to feel your soft wrinkled hands touch my face look me and “Rita its ok I am going to protect you”. I really could use one of your talks right now. It seems like no one understands me the way you did. Not one day go by that I don’t think of you hear your voice in my ear. Some days I swear I can smell your scent in the air or hear you calling my name. And then reality sets in that it’s all in my mind and heart and I start to realized that it’s just memories. I think it hurts me the most the way you left. Sometime I get mad and feel like you left me in this world to endure all this hurt heartache and pain. But I know that you was tired and you couldn’t bear anymore. You taught me so much while you were here that I was able to use over the years to survive because after you passed I had no “real supervision” and I made plenty of mistakes and had to start over so many times. And even though at time I break down and I cry and I feel like throwing in the towel I don’t because I have three beautiful and wonderful children to love and protect I know that you are proud of the strong independent woman you raised me to be and for this I am so thankful and will always love you……. I miss you